Surrogacy has brought so much into my life. New friends, close relationships with the families I carried for, expanded mindset, newfound appreciation for infertility struggles, etc. It’s one of the greatest decisions I’ve made.
One thing that has been annoying though is that when you are pregnant for surrogacy, you don’t seem to get the same “break” as you do when you’re pregnant with your own child. What I mean is that people still expect a lot out of you that I don’t think they would if you were pregnant for yourself. Usually when you’re pregnant, people are more willing to let you rest or not burden you with some task. When it comes to surrogacy, it seems as if people think you shouldn’t be as tired or that they shouldn’t ask you for extras. At least this is my experience.
This is especially true when it comes to my parents. They will still schedule something without seemingly much thought if it was too much for me at the moment. Such as they knew we were coming back from a weekend trip and decided to schedule a Christmas celebration for that very same day at 4:00 pm. So that day, we drove back from the resort, unpacked, I picked up the dog from the sitter, finished wrapping presents, and was to their house by 4:00 pm. It was hectic and crazy. It made me wonder if they wouldn’t have had that expectation had this not been a surrogacy pregnancy. Maybe for others it’s just viewed as “a job” so you should have to push yourself.
I’m not sure. It’s just something I’ve noticed. Maybe I’m just in a complaining type of mood today and will feel differently tomorrow.